Passes & Canyons Blog

Hands-free is now the law in Colorado. At last.

Using your phone–unless it is hands-free–is now prohibited, but the law could be better. It’s still only a secondary offense, meaning the cops can’t stop you just for using your phone but if they stop you for something else they can also fine you for the phone. And if they’re eager to make the point it’s usually not hard to find some primary offense to stop you for, then let you off on speeding (57 in a 55 zone) but give you the ticket for the phone. Be warned. Heck, just hang the damn thing up. Your call is not more important than my life.

Now, did I shoot those photos above while driving? Nope. I have a dash camera and I popped out the memory card when I got home and downloaded those images.

Biker Quote for Today

Riding a motorcycle is unique unto itself and unknowable to the outside world. — Jon Robertson

I looked at the outside thermometer on Tuesday morning (28) and asked myself what I was trying to prove to who? I drove my car to the Last Brass Monkey Run. I knew that on a sunny day with no ice on the road there would be a good number of hard-core folks heading to the Rock Rest on their bikes, but I was not going to be one of them. A final temperature check (36) as I was getting ready to leave made me reconsider but nope, I drove.

ABATE of Colorado’s Last Brass Monkey Run is always promoted as the last ride of the year, and is held on December 31, regardless of the weather. It is held these days at the Rock Rest Lodge in Golden, and I generally go.

So I got there, and yeah, there were bikes parked outside. Oh well. Some people are more hard-core than me. I have ridden some years.

The event used to be an actual poker run but nowadays the poker is set up inside, with games you play to receive your card. I’ve never had even a decent hand at a poker run so I never expect much. But this time was different. I drew three 2s. A pretty low three of a kind but still a three of a kind. Who knows, I might win something.

There are always door prizes as well and in recent years there have been enough door prizes for everyone there to get one. Of course, due to simple reality, someone is destined to be the one with the last ticket drawn. Last year that was me. And my prize was pretty much the dregs of what you might receive.

This year I was not last. When I arrived they were already calling numbers but very soon afterward announced there were stopping the drawing to have lunch. I got some lunch and was sitting with Kathy and Mike, holding ticket number 699. People finished eating and they announced a resumption of the door prize drawings and Mike said “OK Ken, get ready, it’s gonna be 699.” Larry looked at the ticket and called out “699.” No bull.

My prize was OK, nothing great, but really something we had no use for. I didn’t care, I was waiting for the best poker hand.

Larry got up to announce the winners and he said he had never seen such a lousy bunch of poker players. That gave me more hope.

And the top winner was . . . three of a kind 8s. Dang. Well, there is a second place prize as well. Second place was three of a kind 5s. Double dang. My 2s were just too low.

Meanwhile, another Kathy, Larry’s wife, had joined us at our table and remarked how she had hoped to get what I had gotten. I gave it to her.

So it was an enjoyable time, good to see a bunch of folks I don’t see all that often any more since I no longer go to ABATE meetings. Who knows, maybe next year I’ll ride. Maybe.

Biker Quote for Today

100 reasons not to date a biker: 51. We pay more for insurance than your car payment.

Judy put into words what I was thinking. “It’s going to be a great day to ride.”

We weren’t the only ones who thought so–I encountered my first other biker less than five blocks from home. And I saw a lot more before I got back.

In fact, with only three days left in 2024, this was likely to be the best of the three. But I’m still planning to ride on Tuesday, to the Rock Rest Lodge, for ABATE of Colorado’s Last Brass Monkey Run.

A couple things to note: Having had one battery in my heated gloves give out on me before I finished my ride last time, this time I set that one to the lowest setting while setting the other at the number 2 setting. Both gave me heat for the whole ride. Also, when I have started the Honda recently it has once again taken to pumping out a huge cloud of blue smoke. I took it in to get that fixed earlier this year but it refused to smoke for them so they didn’t know what to work on. And for a long time after I got it back it did not smoke. Now it’s smoking again. I’ll get a video next time I start it up so they’ll at least have something to go on.

I had gone southeast the last two times I’d been out so this time I figured I’d go southwest. I took Belleview west to University, then south to where, past C-470, it becomes Lincoln Avenue, and then turned south on Quebec. This is the road that leads south to Daniels Park. I continued on south on Daniels Park Road, to US 85 as it runs down toward Castle Rock. I headed northwest, toward Sedalia, finally deciding I wanted to go to Red Rocks.

A straight shot is no fun, though, so when I got to Titan Road I took it west and followed as it dipped south around the south end of Chatfield Reservoir. Then north on Wadsworth to C-470. I followed C-470 to the Morrison exit and got off, went into Morrison and took Mount Vernon Avenue/Hog Back Road up to the entrance to Red Rocks.

Red Rocks is always busy and there is no admission fee except on days when there are concerts scheduled. This day was no exception. I went all the way to the top, to the parking circle at the high end of the amphitheatre, where I recollected that there was primo motorcycle parking. Circling the area I figured there must not be motorcycle parking any more but then spotted it, not actually within the circle but just outside. Great. Time to get off, stretch my legs, and get some photos.

Heading out I went through the park to the south entrance, just west of Morrison, and then south to catch US 285 and follow it east and back home.

This was about my sixth ride in December. What great weather. In the meantime, the mountains have gotten pounded by snow. You’ve got to love living in Colorado.

Biker Quote for Today

100 reasons not to date a biker: 33. We’re covered in dead bugs. 34. You’re covered in dead bugs.

OK, I’m being lazy again this Christmas Day, just as I was at Thanksgiving this year. No full blown blog post; just best wishes to all for the season. I’ll be back on the job next week.

Biker Quote for Today

You might be a Yuppie biker if you really believe that there are bikes that come customized from the factory.

We had the winter solstice the other day, which means winter is officially begun. To me that means it’s time to ride. I don’t ever put my bikes away.

We’ve been having such a mild December so far that I’ve been riding quite a bit. In fact, if I can get in just a few more days on the Honda I may actually manage to get its yearly mileage up over 1,000. I’m already well past the number of miles I put on that bike last year. It has been three years since I’ve managed to get 1,000 on that bike and honestly, I’m not expecting to this year, but if the weather stays good and I’m not too busy with other things I just might.

I knocked off 100 miles on Sunday. It was cool but I started off smart this time, with the electric vest turned on and the heated gloves set at level 2 right from the start. It was very cloudy and that makes a huge difference in how warm it feels but I was very comfortable the whole time.

My plan, such as it was, was to pick up where I left off last time, getting down to Hilltop Road and then south on Flintwood Road to reach CO 86 east of Franktown. I worked my way over to Potomac and then took it a long way south to where it currently hits a T intersection at Hess Road. I say “currently” because they are building some new housing development on the south side of Hess and while not open yet, the road continuing south is already there.

I turned east on Hess, crossed Parker Road, and picked up Hilltop, which eventually angled off to the southeast while Flintwood headed straight south. Approaching CO 86 I had no plans. Right (west) to Franktown and then . . . ? Or left (east) toward and Elizabeth and then . . . ?

I turned east. Cruised out to Elizabeth and then turned south on County Road 17/21. As I was riding along I thought about a road out this way that goes east to who knows where that I’ve thought many times about checking out. Maybe today was that day. I’m not really sure where that road is, however, I just know it when I see it. I know it’s down this way somewhere.

Well, the road I was on bends around and comes out to County Road 25 just maybe half a mile north of Elbert. OK, that road I was thinking of is definitely south of Elbert and I was not going to go all that way today. Oh well. Instead of turning south and going through Elbert I turned north and headed up toward Kiowa.

Coming into Kiowa I was interested to see if there were any bikes I recognized parked outside of Patty Ann’s. If there was I would stop and go in and probably have lunch. But there was only one and I didn’t recognize it so I went on past and turned north on the Kiowa-Bennett Road.

A good ways before you get to Bennett, though, you reach Quincy, which is the only paved road back to town from this area. I stopped for a break at the intersection and then headed back toward town. About the time I reached Parker Road there by Cherry Creek State Park I noticed my left hand was feeling a bit chilly. My heated gloves use batteries and one of the original batteries had died some time ago. I had bought a replacement but now the other original seems to be dying. Gonna need another battery soon.

From Parker it was just a straight shot home. Winter will take its shots at me later but for now I laughed in its face.

Biker Quote for Today

“Where will you go?” asked Cinda. Now, there was a question without a good answer. — Jon Robertson

Chicks dig guys on motorcycles, it has been said. And yeah, there’s some truth to that–we all know it. So it’s natural to wonder what encounters or even escapades have been visited upon the OFMC over the years. Well, there have been a few.

First we need to make clear that in the very early days neither Bill nor I were married, so potential did exist. But the fact is that nothing ever happened in those years and then we both got married. Being married changes the dynamic a bit (he said with considerable understatement).

Way back in 1995 Bill had a problem with the stator on his Honda Shadow so John and I left without him. He jury-rigged a fix and later met us in Thermopolis, Wyoming. Meanwhile, that first day, John and I made it to Wheatland and got a room for the night. Being a couple guys out on a fun trip, we had a bite to eat and then hit a nearby bar.

We were just minding our own business when a quite drunk and not at all attractive local woman approached us. We were happy to make conversation but she quickly brought the conversation around to, would the two of us like to head back to her place? OK, didn’t really expect this. Um, no. No thanks. Gosh, thanks for asking. But by golly, she is not forgotten.

In 2003 we spent our only night ever in Aspen. Aspen is super expensive but John found the one reasonably priced place in town. Cool. It was the three of us, Bill, John, and me, and again, we headed for a bar after dinner.

We ended up sitting at the bar right next to a couple women whose tight, taut facial skin told of “work” to banish lines of age. Clearly the well-to-do sort you expect to find in Aspen. We got to chatting with them and they seemed to have some interest in these biker guys they had met, until . . .

At some point I brought up the subject of Hunter Thompson. Besides being an outlandish gonzo journalist, Thompson, a resident of the area, had run for sheriff of Pitkin County. He didn’t win but as I recall he didn’t exactly get crushed at the polls either. I asked the woman next to me if there had ever been an likelihood that he might win.

Her reaction took us totally by surprise. She immediately grew very hostile and acted insulted at the idea that we would think they were stupid enough to vote for such an idiot. Um, excuse me but I was implying nothing and only asking a question. Guess maybe it’s time we move on to some other watering hole.

Then in 2005 we were in Encampment, Wyoming. This was the first day of the trip and it was a pretty short ride to get there so once again (is there a theme developing here?) we were in the only local establishment when a big crowd of bikers on a poker run engulfed the place. We got to talking and partying with the crowd and then at one point a local woman seemed to take a bit of an interest in Bill.

Bill was still single at this point so when she suggested they go for a ride he was happy to oblige. John and I were thinking, OK, Bill’s going to get lucky. But then it wasn’t long before he was back, without her. Turned out, he told us, along the way they spotted a guy who didn’t look friendly. “Oh, oh, that’s my ex-husband,” she told him. So he dropped her off and made a possibly well-advised exit.

In 2010 we didn’t go to Wyoming, we did a trip around Wyoming. By now it was a much bigger group, with sons and friends of sons joining the older guys on the ride. We stopped one night in Big Timber, Montana, where the only thing going at night was the bowling alley. It was a happening night at the bowling alley, with a lot of drinking going on, and after awhile the old guys headed on back to the hotel, leaving the scene to the young guys.

We were in an old hotel of the sort where there were no private facilities; the restrooms were down the hall. Sometime during the night John pulled on his pants and went down the hall to get rid of some beer and heard some odd thumping going on in one of the shower stalls. The next morning he learned it had been Matt–the brother of a friend of a son, on his only ride with the OFMC–and some lady he met at the bar. So for once something actually happened.

Later on that same trip we were in Broadus, Montana, and just hanging out in the parking lot at our motel in the evening. Some woman also staying there was attracted to all these bikers and came over to chat. Very friendly. Turned out she was working. Why anyone would choose to ply that trade in this little wide spot in the road is beyond me. She didn’t find any business among our crowd, although Matt did show some amount of interest. Young guys and testosterone.

So yeah, that’s the sort of wild and crazy life you lead when you’re a stud biker.

Biker Quote for Today

You know you’re a biker when nothing heals like two wheels.

About five minutes before I got home on Thursday some guy on a GS ruined the lede I had composed for this blog post. I’m always playing with words in my head when I’m riding so that when the time comes to write about the ride it usually just flows because it’s already half written.

What I intended to lead with was: One telling thing about my ride on Thursday was that I didn’t see one single other rider. Not one. It was cold.

But there I was at Boston and Arapahoe and this guy on a GS goes by. Oh well.

It was cold. Fortunately, for once I was prepared. I wore my riding pants with my heaviest long underwear, my electric vest, and my heated gloves. I almost blew it with the gloves. I figured my winter gloves would be enough but then I figured I might as well bring the heated ones along in the tank bag. Then I had a better thought and put them on right at the start, set to the lowest setting. By the time I came home I was no longer on the lowest setting so you can imagine how cold my hands would have been without the heat.

With all this gear, however, it was a very comfortable ride. It was sunny most of the time and that makes a big difference.

I knew I wanted to be out at least an hour because I needed 46 miles on the Honda to at least get more miles on it this year than last. The time is past to ride in the mountains this year so I headed for the prairie.

Out Hampden all the way till it ends at Gun Club Road and I turned south. I wanted to get onto Smoky Hill Road and then it was my intent to take that series of roads south to where I would get to CO 86 coming west from Elizabeth, then take it west to Franktown. I didn’t have plans beyond Franktown.

But out in that area there are a lot of roads and I don’t get down that way particularly often, so I sometimes am not sure which road is going to come out where. I was wrong this time. I rode Smoky Hill to where it ends with a right turn and becomes Delbert Road. This is out on the current fringes of the city, where the housing developments finally end, and I always like to see just how much more there is out there than the last time I was there. There’s always more.

Delbert ends with a T intersection at Singing Hills Road and at first I thought I was on CO 86 but I soon saw that I was wrong. Oh yeah, I know where this goes. It feeds into Hilltop Road and that leads you back to Parker Road. OK, fine. Not what I planned but it will do.

Actually, looking at the map now I see that a left turn onto Hilltop, rather than the right I took, would have gotten me onto Flintwood Road and that was the one I had been looking for. I’m hoping these details stick better in my brain now.

Now I was headed northwest on Hilltop and crossed the intersection with Parker onto Hess Road. Hess Road bends around and heads south, coming out at I-25 down by Castle Pines. As I like to do there, I got on the frontage road, not the slab, and took that north to Ridgegate Parkway, jogged east on Ridgegate to South Peoria, crossed E-470 and turned left to loop around the south end of Centennial Airport. Then north on Inverness Drive West to Clinton, the jog over to Boston, and a stop at the light at Arapahoe. And there goes that guy on the GS.

Then just north to home. I more than got in my 46 miles and I had a really nice ride. Thank goodness for electrics.

Biker Quote for Today

You might be a Yuppie biker if your jeans are clean; in fact, if any spot on you is clean.

I saw an article the other day that talked about something I had not heard before and I wondered if this is well known and I’m just out of the loop.

The signal is setting your helmet behind your bike when you’re pulled over along the road.

This is usually just to signal that they are having mechanical trouble, but it could also be a signal for medical trouble, injury, or other problems. It’s an unofficial rule, but a widely acknowledged one.

That’s a quote from the article, which also says the Canadian Ministry of Transportation has a motorcycle handbook that tells you to do this.

I’ve been riding for about 35 years and had never heard this before. It sounds like a good idea, but that would be providing that other bikers know what it means. Until now, I would not have known.

Now, theoretically bikers stop for each other in trouble just automatically. That’s not really the case, though, as I think we all know. I have certainly had riders stop to ask if I need assistance, sometimes when I was just stopped to take a break. You bet I appreciated their thoughtfulness. But I’ve also been stopped along the road actually in need of assistance and watched as bike after bike just blew on by. So I like the idea of something concrete like this to really say “Hey! I need help!”

I would think you would do best to put the helmet maybe 10 to 15 feet behind the bike–maybe more–for two reasons. First, if it’s right next to the rear wheel it may just look like you took it off and set it down. But also, the further away from the bike the more time that gives passing riders to react and hit their brakes.

I had a flat on I-70 out by Rifle one time and I waved frantically at every bike that passed but they were all going so fast that by the time they had a chance to react they were already 100 feet beyond me. One couple did finally stop–about 200 feet past me–and came running back to help.

And who knows. Maybe someone in a car who read this same article will recognize the issue and stop to help.

Biker Quote for Today

A guy letting a girl ride his motorcycle is like saying “I love you.”