Passes & Canyons Blog

ADV has an ongoing thread I like to dip into at times, asking what the most stupid question you’ve been asked while on your motorcycle. Here are a few more.

• I was once at the Slickrock trailhead in Moab & a Valley Girl asked me: “Do those dirt bikes work on the rock?”
• Again today after having ridden to work I got “Did you ride your bike today” (me with full gear on walking into the building carrying my helmet). I finally cracked and said, “Nope… I’m just REEEEEEEEEALLY careful when I drive.”
• I swear to God, I get this all the time when I pull up on my KLX covered with mud, knobbies and all: “Is that a dirt bike?”
• I stopped by a huge dealership one day to grab something on the way home, still in my one piece leathers, carrying a helmet, and some sales guy asked me if I had a bike. How do you even justify that with a response?
• Not stupid… but about five years ago my buddies and I (sportbikes, full leathers, you know the look) were having breakfast at an IHOP before going on a Sunday ride. As we were getting up to leave, a little boy, maybe about 4 years old, walks right up to one of my buds and goes, “mister, are you a Power Ranger?” I just about died laughing on that one.
• My son used to ride with me and he always wore his helmet into the store he was so pleased to be on the back of a bike. Cashier asked him if he was on a m/c. He said no, I fall down a lot. I was SO proud of him!!
• I was at a local motorcycle shop, and a prospective rider was asking about the different brands of bikes. I was looking though the tires on the rack, minding my own business, when I heard the prospective rider ask the shop employee, “KTM, hmmm, where are those made?”
  “Australia” he responded… I couldn’t take it, so I respectfully interjected:
  “Actually, they are made in Austria.”
  “Really,” the shop employee said, “I thought they were made in Europe.” He was being genuine.
  Geography, without it, you’re nowhere!
• I get to work one very cold day, a girl asks me as I walk into the office with all my gear still on,” did you ride your motorcycle today? ” I replied, no way it’s to cold, so I pushed it in!
• A couple months ago I broke my collarbone. I must have had 10 people ask me “were you wearing a helmet?”
• I get strange looks at stoplights when on my bike but I guess it’s because I have a yellow mohawk on my helmet. I had one woman roll down her window and ask why I had it. I told her that it was for safety. She gave me a strange look and I explained that since she put down her cell phone and looked at me – in disgust – that it had served its purpose. You don’t have to like it, but you do see it. Haven’t had anyone pull out in front of me while I’ve had the mohawk on. I take it off when going to see customers because I want to give a more professional appearance – as best as I can while riding an old school bright yellow superbike.

Biker Quote for Today

I’m not speeding, I’m qualifying.

We were up in Eagle at Willie and Jungle’s earlier this week and to our pleasure and surprise, Mario was there, too. You’ll understand what a surprise this was as I tell you Mario lives in the Yukon. He’s a long way from home.

We met Mario four years ago on a ride Judy and I did with Willie and Jungle and some others up to British Columbia, to Banff and Jasper, along the Ice Fields Parkway. Mario flew in from the Yukon to Calgary, rented a car, met us in Radium Hot Springs, then cruised with us for about five days. Super nice guy.

So among the many things we talked about, Mario told us of a road north of where he lives that had been built across the tundra. I don’t recall if he said anything about the purpose of the road or where it went to and from, but the road itself was the item of interest. First off, it’s hard to build a road across the tundra. As the soil freezes and thaws the road gets lifted, sinks, and you end up with mile after mile of some terrific whoops. Whoops are great fun for a short distance but not something you want to drive on for a couple hundred miles.

To build this road they laid down some kind of fabric as wide as the road was to be and then covered it with sand. We’re talking some honking big rolls of fabric. Let’s see: 18 feet by 150 miles . . .

You can see how this type of road could better handle the freeze and thaw and the shifting. But there was some kink that nobody had expected. In the first couple months it was open, Mario said, the EMTs had to go out something like 50 times because motorcycles had had bad crashes. And primarily these were all heavy cruisers, Harleys mainly. What the heck was going on?

Mario went out to ride the road himself on his Kawasaki KLR 650. Everything was fine at first but then it got to where he felt like he was floating. He came close to crashing but managed to ride it out. What the heck?

Riding on, more cautiously now, the same thing kept happening. He had a hunch, and he pulled over to see if he was right. This is not a busy road so he had to wait awhile but eventually another vehicle came along and he saw just what he expected to see. It was like this.

The fabric material was waterproof, and beneath it, with the sun beating down on the sand, heat permeated and melted the permafrost. This released water, which had nowhere to go so it sat there. When a vehicle would come along some of the water would get pushed along under the fabric, gradually building up to something of a wave, which would start lifting the front end of a motorcycle up–the floating feeling–until such time as the front wheel would go on over the crest of the wave and suddenly the biker was running steeply downhill ahead of the wave. Then you hit level ground at a steep downhill angle and things do not go well.

Once he had this figured out Mario pushed on, cautiously, and eventually found what seemed to be the best way to ride it. He would stand up on the pegs and lean back, like you would on sand going down a hill. Hard to do on a big Harley, but OK on a KLR. So he rode to the end of the road and then turned around and rode back. Fun in the Yukon, huh?

Biker Quote for Today

More people die in their sleep than on motorcycles, so sleep less, ride more.

I always tally up the miles I’ve put on my bikes and car at the end of the year and for the seventh year in a row I put more miles on the bikes than on the car. Not that I put all that many miles on anything this past year.

My total mileage for 2021 on the bikes was 5,419. That breaks down to 1,086 for the Honda CB750, 2,002 for the Kawasaki Concours, and 2,331 for the Suzuki V-Strom. My Hyundai Elantra only got driven a total of 2,494 miles in the year. Can you say “home body”?

I know most of this is due to Covid but it’s funny because I don’t feel like I’ve been all that restricted. Life has really been pretty much normal, with the exception that Judy and I haven’t taken a lot of trips.

Not that we haven’t traveled. We did fly to Kansas City, where we rented a car and drove around in the Midwest. That was a really nice trip. But we didn’t go camping once all year, and we usually go several times. With everyone suffering cabin fever the campgrounds have been swarming and getting a campsite reservation is tough.

And while that was Judy’s only trip for the year, I went on two motorcycle trips, with the OFMC and the RMMRC, and I also went yurt camping with the guys out at Ridgway State Park. It used to be you could go somewhere and rent a cabin but I guess now the big thing is yurts. They have to be cheaper to build so I’m guessing that’s why, but it’s pretty much the same thing.

The main point is that I haven’t exactly been stuck at home. And I did put more miles on the Honda this year than last, and more miles on the car, too. More than twice as many miles on the Suzuki, but fewer on the Kawasaki. And more miles overall on the bikes than the previous year.

So I’d largely call it a good year. Still, I’m hoping 2022 will be better. And I hope it is for you, too.

Biker Quote for Today

We know you’re a poser if there are no wrinkled, faded, creased, or scratched areas on your leathers.

Every year about this time I start looking at what I want to get done before the end of the year. Usually that includes making an effort to turn over one more 1,000-mile point on each bike’s odometer and then any other odd objective I can identify.

Turning over 1,000-mile points is especially easy–or irrelevant–this year. On the Honda CB750 the meter is sitting now at 35,940. Can I put another 60 miles on that bike yet this year. Is the sky blue?

It’s even more of a no-brainer on the Kawasaki Concours. That meter now sits at 73,986. We’re looking at 14 miles. Yeah, I think I’ll manage that.

And then there’s the Suzuki V-Strom. That meter is now reading 38,181. You can either say that one is totally out of reach or you can look at it that I already passed that 1,000-mile mark 181 miles ago. I’ve put a lot of miles on that bike this year so I’m going with the latter interpretation.

This year I do have a different goal for the Honda, however. In the beginning this was my only bike and all the miles I rode were on it. Then I got the Kawi and didn’t ride the Honda as much, and then I got the V-Strom and the time on the Honda went way down. For a whole bunch of years I didn’t even put 1,000 miles a year on that bike. So now that in itself has become an objective.

At the start of this year that bike had 35,048 on the dial. So instead of just putting 60 miles on it yet this year I really want to go at least 108. Still totally doable, I just have to get out and do it. And if this great weather continues that will be easy.

So what else do I want to get done before January 1? Well, often as we head into winter I’m looking at my tires and figuring I need better rubber for the winter. Not this year. Already this year I’ve gotten two new back tires and one new front. All the other rubber is good, lots of deep tread. Tires are no issue.

Plus, they’ve all had oil changes and the Honda and Kawi had overall tune-ups. I guess I’d have to say all three are in pretty darn good shape at this point. That’s kind of a nice way to end the year.

Biker Quote for Today

Biker new year’s resolutions: 1. Ride bikes. 2. Look at bikes. 3. Talk about bikes. 4. Repeat.

I can’t even remember how long ago it was that my Concours started giving me trouble, but it seems like it’s been all summer. I packed it off to Joel before the OFMC bike trip but when he brought it back Joel said it still needed more work. But there wasn’t time to do that before the trip.

Once I got back from that trip I ordered the necessary parts and called Joel to let him know they were in hand and I was ready for him to come get the bike again, and this time bring it back really, truly fixed.

Well, Joel brought it back the other day and first I took it on a brief errand run to the wine store and then a few days later I rode it with the RMMRC to Daniels Park. And there was just one word for it: normal.

How wonderful it is for that bike to be operating normally again, finally. Normal is so great.

No more racing at a screaming pace when I pull up to a stop. No more dying as I coast to a stop. No more needing to ride around the neighborhood first to get the bike running halfway smoothly before getting out on the less forgiving main roads.

It was also nice once again to have the feeling of power. I had never noticed a lack of power in my other bikes before but lately I have. On the Colorado Cruise with the RMMRC I was on the V-Strom and for the first time it seemed like it was struggling for power going over the highest passes. That bike is currently with Joel and I hope it feels more back to normal when he brings it back. And then the other day I rode the Honda CB750 with the RMMRC up to Kremmling, and that bike was totally left in the dust by those other bigger bikes. The Connie has the power to keep up with any of these other guys.

Yeah, normal can often be boring. We crave some change, some variety. But when you’ve had a steady diet of not normal, and it hasn’t been fun, it’s amazing how wonderful normal can be. We all know that old Chinese curse: May you live in interesting times. Right now I’m really hoping to be living in some boring times.

Biker Quote for Today

100 reasons not to date a biker: 19. We “need” a bunch of expensive riding gear, usually 2 or 3 of each item.

We’re home now from this year’s OFMC ride and while I’m eager to tell you all about the trip, if you’re really hard-core your number one question would be, “how did the Kawi run?”

I can’t give a one- or two-word answer to that. So I won’t.

It ran well. It ran a lot better than it did before Joel worked on it. It did not run perfectly and at times it ran alarmingly. Details:

Ever since this bike has been giving me problems it has been hard to get it going from a start. Once in motion it has run OK, other than dying when I’m coasting to a stop. Those problems are gone. There are new ones.

All Kawasakis, as far as I know, are cold-blooded, meaning you need to fire them up and let them run a few moments before you take off. This one is no different but now it responds more readily to a twist of the throttle than it had been doing. The flip side of that is that when I roll off the throttle the engine does not immediately back off as it should. It continues to run hot for a moment and then fades.

Or worse. At times, though fortunately not all the time, the throttle seemed to stick and every time I would pull in the clutch the engine would race. Imagine pulling up to a red light, pulling in the clutch to stop, and having your engine sound like you’re screaming down the highway. I suspect that at its worst that kind of thing could damage the engine. What I would do is let the clutch out just a tiny bit and hold firmly on the brake. That reduced the screaming. It was probably hell on the clutch.

The rest of the bike was great. I knew there was enough rubber on the back tire for the trip but that I would need a new one when I got home. We actually rode about 400 miles more than I anticipated so let’s say I was definitely correct about the tire, in both ways. When I give the bike back to Joel to put in the needed carb parts and get the bike running the way it should I’ll also have him put on a new tire.

But the bike did me well on the trip and that’s the most important thing. And it was a great trip–can’t wait to tell you about it.

Biker Quote for Today

Life is a big road with lots of signs, so when riding through ruts, don’t complicate your mind, wake up and live life.