Posts Tagged ‘group dynamics’

Don’t Be That Guy

Thursday, May 15th, 2025

In Utah on the second day of the ride.

When you start riding with a new bunch of guys it is incumbent on you to become acquainted with the ways of the group. For instance, the RMMRC is very focused on safe riding and thus, if you wish to ride with this group you need to wear a helmet and don’t plan to make any stops that include drinking.

Another thing the RMMRC is pretty serious about is that a time is set for kickstands up (KSU) and when that time comes you are expected to be geared up, on your bike, and ready to roll. On a day ride, if KSU is at 9 a.m. and you arrive at 9:05 you will probably arrive to find an empty parking lot.

On longer rides, however, such as this recent California trip, if you are signed up to come and you’re not there we’ll generally wait for you, but a late arrival will not be appreciated at all unless you have a really good reason.

So it was that KSU was set for 10 a.m. on this trip and the rest of us were ready at 10 a.m. but one guy–I won’t name names but will refer to him as HE–was not there. Alan called him and HE was at Hampden and University, which was still 20 minutes away from where we were. Not a good way to start off.

So we waited and HE finally showed up. But HE needed gas. Fine. We waited. When HE was done at the pump we hit our starter buttons but HE pulled over behind me, parked, and got off his bike, and started wandering around. That was too much, so we pulled away from our parking places and lined up ready to pull onto the road. HE was digging through one of his bags. We left. Later when we stopped in Idaho Springs, Alan called him again and HE was in Evergreen. Fine. We’ll see you in Eagle.

We regrouped in Eagle and rode on to Fruita, our stop for the night. We all gathered for dinner but HE did not join us. Your choice, but not particularly social. Nor did HE join us for breakfast but at least HE was there ready to go at the appointed hour the next morning.

HE did not join us for dinner in Loa, either, that night, and while HE did not have breakfast with the group the next morning, HE was there at the spot for KSU. Except as we all sat astride our bikes ready to roll, HE announced that he needed to go get gas. And off HE went.

This was when sickness engulfed me and I had to tell the guys to go on without me. The last thing I heard on my Cardo as I rode back to the motel was Dave telling the others that “I’m going to the gas station and glare at him while he gets gas.”

OK, he’s new to the group. If I had stayed with the group I’m sure I would have had a word with him about the significance of KSU. And perhaps Dave did later. Dave’s the sort of guy who would make a point to have that talk, perhaps in sterner terms than I might use.

But you owe it to yourself and to the others to learn the ways of the group if you want to fit in. And really, making everyone else wait is never a courteous thing to do in any circumstance. Just practice common courtesy, OK? What’s so hard about that?

Biker Quote for Today

As I turn off the pavement and onto the long stretch of dirt ahead, the rear tire spins and kicks up rocks through first and second gear. I click it into third, and that’s when she really opens up to breathe.

Group Dynamics On A Motorcycle Trip

Thursday, October 11th, 2018
people at Lake Louise

Part of our group at Lake Louise.

Everyone is an individual and so it is a simple truism that every group is different and group dynamics are different from one group to another. Plus, group dynamics change as a group changes. When you become part of a group it behooves you to figure out the group dynamics.

With the OFMC, it started out very simple. Each of us took our turns leading, not by any formal process but simply based on who felt like being in front at this moment. That would change if someone got a wild hair and wanted to put on some speed for awhile. Bill goes blasting past and we either pick up the pace to join him or we catch up with him when he slows down. John wants to stop, he either pulls over when he chooses or, if he’s behind, he blasts ahead and then stops. It’s easy with three.

As the group got bigger it got more complicated. Friggs became the one who set the pace in terms of taking off from a stop. We learned that it just didn’t make any sense to even put on your helmet until Friggs put on his. He was always the last to be ready to ride.

If you didn’t want somebody right on your butt, make sure not to get immediately in front of Randy. Randy would target fixate on your rear bumper and stay close, right behind you, rather than staggering to one side or the other.

Don’t try to ride a staggered formation with Dennis because Dennis is all over the road. If the folks behind you want to ride in staggered formation, just pick one side of the road or the other and stay there, so the folks behind can all stay in one spot. Sometimes Dennis will be right ahead of you and sometimes he won’t. Live with it.

What am I in all this? It embarrasses me a little to have to say I don’t really know. You’d need to ask the other guys. I do know that I was one guy who everyone figured knew where he was going. With a larger group John became the leader almost all the time but sometimes he had to berate the guys for not paying attention to our route. The only one he had confidence to know where we were going was Ken, he would tell them.

Now that John’s health has him not riding any more, I have become the leader. I planned our last trip and rode in front most of the time. But I did make a point, when I knew one guy was clear on the route and destination, to suggest he lead for awhile. And it seemed like they kind of enjoyed taking that spot occasionally.

Riding this summer to British Columbia with Willie and Jungle and others, the dynamics were set. This was their ride so Jungle always rode lead and Willie always rode sweep. Except, with two Slingshots and a Porsche Carrera 2 in the mix, people sometimes had other ideas.

Terry, in her Porsche, was sometimes impatient with the group going what she considered slow. So she would take off on her own and we’d see her again whenever we did.

As the den mother for the group, Willie often found herself telling the rest of us to go ahead, she and JC, in his Slingshot, would catch up. It seems JC has a wont for shopping and thought nothing of wandering off to some shops just as the rest of us were getting ready to go.

Meanwhile, Jean has her issues with JC and to the extent possible, she stayed as far away from him as possible. With seven or more of us in the group that was fairly easy, and Willie–again the den mother–went out of her way to ensure they didn’t end up sitting next to each other at meals. JC, of course, was unaware of any of these machinations.

So what got me thinking about this is that after Judy and I peeled off to blast home so I could turn around and leave on the OFMC trip, she wondered how our departure would affect the group dynamics. And especially how much harder it would now be to keep Jean separate from JC.

People are people. Each is unique. When two or more come together you get group dynamics. The patterns are infinite. This is life.

Biker Quote for Today

Don’t wait for life, ride to meet it.